Social Sloth

For someone who is never home, I don't get out much.

Get out, you know, like with people besides my kids.  I do enjoy talking with my dance parent friends because, we all share the crazy and I get to talk to, you know, grown ups. In person.  Although talking to people in person is highly overrated. I'd even go so far as to say it's outdated.  (This is how I justify my life.  Don't judge me.)

So, after a really long week (or two, time runs together when you work from home with a 3 year old and a dog as your administrative assistants.) I sent my sister a text begging her to go out with me tonight. (Note: I did not call.  However, she is one of two people that I usually willingly talk to on the phone.  The other is my mom.)

We went to KO Fusion for dinner because, well, it's a little fancier (read: more expensive) than my usual sushi places, so I don't take the kids there.  Also, they don't serve french fries, so it was unlikely that I would have to listen to anyone else's little preshush snowflakes either. But, as I said, fancier means more $$, so for the price of what I usually pay for a full dinner (soup and two or three full rolls) I got one. roll.  One. Don't get me wrong, it was fanfreakingtastic. But that coupled with the one piece of sashimi didn't do so much to keep away the hunger.

Can you see the glitter?

After that fabulous, but not-so-filling dinner, we walked over to Boltini.  Because. Martinis.  And we were being fancy. I mean, I let Fia spray me with the glitter spray.  You don't get much fancier than that.
 The only problem with Boltini's is that there are too many martinis.  I wanted this champagne and peach schnapps drink, but also wanted creme brulee (because I was still hungry) and I didn't think they'd go well together, so I opted for a chocolate truffltini.  This was a bad idea.  When Fia was two months old, I enjoyed many a chocolate martini on New Year's Eve.  I did not enjoy them on New Year's Day.  I've not gone near one since.  The brain does not forget this association.  I drank it, but decided one was going to be enough.

This is where the fun begins.  We went to Kohl's, Target, AND Wal Mart.  I should be a party planner because I clearly know how to get down.

Why would I want to leave?

In between there, we went to Binny's. I'm in love with Binny's.  You can see why.  I bought some pink bubbly, as inspired by one of those friends who live in my computer. (You know, the ones I generally hang out with on a Friday night.) And I bought some Cupcake Prosecco.  I don't see how you can go wrong there.  One of my favorite types of food and one of my favorites types of wine... (disclaimer: There are no cupcakes harmed in the making of this wine.)  However, two things happened at Binny's.  We were asked repeatedly if we needed help.  This was apparently because we arrived at about 9:50 and they close at 10.  I don't take subtle hints.  Apparently.  And even though i was the one making the purchases, they wanted to card my sister.  And her wallet was in my van.  And she couldn't get back outside because they had locked the doors. Because they were closing.  I distracted them with my glittery hair long enough to make them realize that they'd get to go home faster if they'd just let me check out and that they shouldn't worry, I wasn't planning on sharing my haul* with anyone.

*two bottles...because they were closing and that's all I had time to grab.

Other things that happened: I didn't use my turn signal all night. I tried to drive without turning on my lights.  And I took the interstate home. (Kayla is terrified of the interstate.) And also, this:

I'm so fancy.

Also, I'm 12.